What in the world does pornography addictions and adultery have to do with the blockbuster movie, "Saving Private Ryan"?
Read on and you just might be surprised.
I am certain the producers never thought a segment from this fabulous movie would someday be used to discuss pornography addictions and adultery.
Do you remember the scene where they captured a German soldier and were fighting with each other about what to do with him? It's the scene where Captain John Miller spills the news that he is a school teacher and a baseball coach. This scene is one of my favorite moments in the movie. Here is a clip from this moment.
I loved Tom Hanks in this movie! This is one of my all-time-favorites and one I watch every Memorial Day.
So, what does Saving Private Ryan teach us about pornography addictions and adultery in love and life?
Let's break down the scene above for the answer.
The above movie scene is a pinnacle point in the movie. This band of soldiers are ordered to go on a mission to find one soldier, James Francis Ryan, and bring him home to his mom who was suffering the loss of three other sons in the war.
In this clip they are fighting over killing an enemy soldier whom they have captured. This enemy soldier had just shot one of their beloved team members, and they had just all gone through the unsuccessful attempt of saving the life of this team member while watching him beg for his mom as he dies. This all leads to the above scene in the movie where they are discussing what happens to the enemy soldier they have captured.
A mutiny breaks out in protest of Captain John Miller's decision to let this enemy soldier go. Captain Miller silences the chaos with his declaration of being a school teacher. He then walks over to the young man threatening to disobey orders and abandon the mission and offers to let him go. He tells him what you see in the clip, that he will put in the papers for him to go off and fight the war, but then he stuns him,all the other soldiers, and audiences watching around the world with what he says next.
"Just know every man I kill the farther away from home I feel." Says Hanks character Captain John Miller.
This statement is the key to changing cultural ideas about pornography addictions and adultery. If you have ever counseled with anyone caught in the grips of pornography or adultery, it is evident how estranged they feel from their wife/husband, home and family.
I have listened to husbands explain how they felt so far removed from life as they knew it the more they said yes to the struggle, and I have listened many times to the cries of a wife who feels the man she married has become a stranger. On the one hand, she is relieved to finally have answers to her husband's lack of interest in her or the world they are building together, and on the other hand she is heart-broken with the deep sorrow and betrayal she feels from discovering his pornography addictions or adultery.
Chances are that somebody reading this right now is struggling against pornography or adultery. The cultural voices around you are saying, "Go for it. Nobody gets hurt. It's just a harmless magazine or movie. You're just two consenting adults."
If this describes you, I have something I hope you'll listen to. Put yourself in the movie scene above and change the wording a little.
"Just know with every pornography thrill the farther away from home I feel."
"Just know with every adulterous thrill the farther away from home I feel."
"Just know with every casual sex thrill the farther away from home I feel."
"Just know with every indulgence thrill the farther away from home I feel."
Don't believe it?
Just ask anyone who has gone through it and you just might change your mind.
What we ELEVATE becomes what we CELEBRATE, and what we put down becomes what we kick around. Pornography addictions and adultery roads always lead you away from home. They always leave you selling short the reality you have for the fantasy you're buying.
"Man, without a family, alone in the world trembles in the cold." Andre Maurois
The next time you find yourself in a struggle with pornography or adultery I hope you remember this article. What we magnify we have to manage, so be careful what you allow into the lens of your life telescope. What you allow your eyes to look at can be the very thing that makes you blind to what you already have.
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